Fretless

"Friends are not primarily absorbed in each other. It is when we are doing things together that friendship springs up - painting, sailing ships, praying, philosophizing, fighting shoulder to shoulder. Friends look in the same direction."     - Clive Staples Lewis

With the arrival of a diploma in the mail, I know that a significant chapter of my life has passed. And it got my fantastically overdriven mind thinking. One of the most memorable aspects of undergraduate school were the friendships. With so many friends, class mates, and acquaintances, I had to register to an unnamed website that kept them all organized. How enriching it was to meet people for the first time and realize over and over that I am only a small speck in the human race. Even when I would think I had nothing in common with someone, we would discover a similarity - ultimate frisbee, nerdiness art, weight lifting, music, moral values, dreams, aspirations, sense of humor.

I found that coming to school with a group of friends put me in a minority. Most people I met started NC State not knowing a soul. Freshman and Sophomore year I lived with 6 previous friends, with one already being a friend of 7 years at the time. I felt little need to make new friends because I already had a posse; thankfully this mindset was drastically altered.

Although I befriended so many spectacular men and women, the unnamed site claims I have over 350 of them, and my phone's contact list takes 5 minutes to scroll through; I know this is a misrepresentation. Excluding relatives, I can count on both hands the true, inner-circle friends in my life. Like Dr. Lewis said, friends look in the same direction, fighting shoulder to shoulder. All too often, friends we thought would never leave our side, decide to. While they brandish the same smile, laugh, or magnetic force that brought you together; they are no longer. We know the level of friendship we once had can never be reattained. This is life. The constant flux. But through this churning and flowing of magma-like time, strong friends are made stronger. Inner-circle friends.

The small group of people I call friends don't need to be affirmed of the fact; they just know. Friends like these don't agree with me all the time; they hold me accountable and keep me in check. Friends like these don't require words to communicate. Friends like these enlighten me of food on my face. Friends like these don't waver, bend, and change when everyone else is. Friends like these sacrifice for me - jobs, comfort, and popularity - when no one else will. Friends like these live now with eternity in mind. Friends like these listen. Friends like these forgive daily. Friends like these will drop what they're doing and help change a flat. Friends like these do not abide by the law of reciprocation or obligation. These are my friends, and I am theirs.

That's all.

Photography by Joshua Thomas